WATCHING WORDS

I am sitting, quietly, watching. The quiet documenter of others lives. I see their lips move the moments in their seemingly interesting fulfilled lives pass away as they talk.

And slowly I sober up. I pull away from the warmth and dulling consistency of their words, the moving harmonies of their throaty supplications. They talk the million voices, like passing gales of icy winds locking me out. They gush in their eagerness, these words enjoining souls, mirroring feelings, breaking and mending hearts, a salve for all ills... These words. They cloak their meanings in the murky depths in between shrouded sentences.

Trains of words put together going somewhere and yet leading nowhere.

And I sit quietly and listen. Until words are expected to leave my mouth. And yet my words seem so discordant so out of place 4/4 in 2/4 time ta-ta-ta-ta-, tate-tate or something like that. Not in synch.

I wanted noise today. I craved these voices, their subtle nuances, their broad proclamations. I needed them. I needed echoes to fill my silences. I searched for harmonies to match my music, prayed for supplications and found them in the words' hopes, fears and dreams.

I stole from the words, stole their strength, undressed their owners, bared their souls with the power the words gave me.

I smile and put my pen down, words again, silently spoken reaching from abroad and getting used, exalted, worshipped, feared, adored. And those that wield them, use them, carve unwittingly into sculptures of the bound variety. I see them watching silently, listening as the words slowly find their way back to them.

This is me

My life was never going to be ordinary, I knew that from the moment I could think for myself. and then I realized it was ordinary that everyone around was just like me wanting to grow rich wanting to be the most acknowledged the most beautiful... Just the most.

Have you ever realized how short life is how insignificant we are to the universe. When I did I started to ask myself who I was? Why I was? and what drove me? I am still on that path. and like all things are connected so I believe that our spirits are connected these are my spirits words I hope they speak to your spirit whoever you are, wherever you are.

I'm a woman and a feminist not your yuppie gung ho feminist, but the kind that believes that what defines us most as women is those things about us that we have been taught to despise. Our bodies, menstrual periods, childbirth and motherhood those things that we have been taught make us less than men. We have been told over and over again that to be equal those things shouldn't define us we can only achieve equality if we are more manly "don the power suit , butch it up .

So slowly we have over the decades been detached from our centers from our centers we have been weakened left without a place to recharge. My spirit - its words are a woman's words in this life time. They are words about a woman's pain, her fear, her, loves, trusts and disappointments.

I welcome you to share them